Spring Break!

It is amazing how just having a little sunshine, a few warmer days (until the past few) and some time to myself can really make a difference in my spirit!  I just felt like a huge weight lifted off of me once the flowers started blooming and the cloudy days disappeared.  Combined with finishing my third quarter grading and now starting our last quarter of the year and yes, finally a week off to myself... wow!  I am golden!

We decided not to travel anywhere this year and I am grateful for some much needed time to myself.  So is my house which definitely needed some TLC.  I don't know what happens but I utterly neglect certain aspects of house-cleaning between my breaks off from school.  Even during all of those snow days, I usually ended up doing grading rather than taking care of cleaning.  Anyway, I can tell just decluttering and doing a little cleaning (and even a little painting this weekend) makes such a difference in my mood.  I am so grateful for the breaks that teachers get from time to time.

The thing though with spring break is that it makes me so long for summer!  Bring it on!!!

We had our appointment with my ob-gyn last week and we decided all together that we should pursue removing my largest uterine fibroid which is embedded into the muscle of the uterine wall.  She referred me to two specialists and I have an appt with one on April 28 and am hoping to get in with the other one soon.  The pursued treatment will be having a myomectomy which is laparascopic and hopefully will result in a shorter recovery.   Of course this depends on what the specialists think too.  Because of where it is, she said that I could still have a healthy pregnancy without removing it, but her concern is that if they needed to do a C-section, it could be very risky because of its location.  That was all I needed to hear.  I hope to have a healthy pregnancy someday still and even better, save my uterus to possibly have another later down the road.  One can keep dreaming!

It was the first time that my DH met my ob-gyn.  He has always been a part of the team at my fertility clinic and ever present at most of those appointments, but this was new territory bringing him down these very female halls.  It felt really good having the conversation with the three of us.  I think he liked my doctor a great deal and it felt solid making the decision together as a team.

Has anyone else had this procedure?  What was your experience?

Goal: March 1

Well, I finally talked to my nurse again and she said that a March 1 goal for my FET is do-able!  I have been procrastinating like crazy but finally checked in.  I will still have my phone consult with my doctor February 12 but at least I can try to get the ball rolling in the meantime.  I like having a goal and a to-do list.  I do better with this.  I can't stand blowing in the breeze because nothing will ever come of it.  I'm on day 19 and I just have to let her know when cycle day 1 is again, so that is exciting because it should be next week! 

Other good news, a lady from my support group emailed me to check in on me.  I really like her a lot and it really touched me that she was thoughtful enough to reach out and see how I was doing.  It was such an uplifting gesture and so simple, and yet it has made me continue to smile all day long.  It made me remember, who in my life do I need to reach out to as well? 

Year 42

Happy Birthday to me!

Today I am trying to focus on what I do have and not on what I don't have.  I am grateful for the gift of time... today we woke up to a snow day from school, so my birthday began perfectly with a chance to snuggle in and sleep a little longer and wake up to a beautiful snow-vista. 

I am grateful for my leisurely cup of coffee.  After two months of trying to get off of coffee in preparation for the embryo transfer... it took me less than 24 hours to enjoy my first cup after the news of our negative pregnancy test on Monday.  This morning I had a chance to really savor it.

I am thankful for the phone call this morning from a dear friend who also struggles with IF and who called to tell me that the flowers that were supposed to be delivered to me at school today will probably be sent to me Monday instead.

I am thankful for the phone call from my Dad this morning.  There is nothing better than the sound of his voice.  I am reminded by the recent death of a friend's father the day before Christmas and how she never will hear the sound of her father telling her happy birthday again.  I am so lucky.

I am thankful for the pajamas I received in the mail from my aunt yesterday from Victoria's Secret.  Who still receives pajamas from her aunt for her 42nd birthday?  I do.  And what I love even more is that they are size small and they still fit even after all of this progesterone bloat that is still attached to me.

I am thankful for the best husband, my spirit's mate, the love of my life who sent me flowers today, who made reservations for dinner tonight and who surprised me with diamond stud earrings this morning.  I was floored, especially when we could probably better use the money for debt and infertility treatments, but I am overjoyed.  I don't want to ever take them off. 

I graded this morning and now I am going to try to spend the afternoon working on some hobbies I enjoy, to make it a perfect day.  Thank you everyone for your love.  I am truly blessed.